Dear Warrior Princess,
2020 has been a memorable year, in mostly the worst ways. It’s hard enough for adults, but kiddos like you are really getting the short end of the stick. I agree – this year sucks – but I’m here with you, and better days will come.
We had a great spring break – a low-tech week of friends, projects, relaxation, and focused fun. But it never ended. You didn’t go back to school, I didn’t go back to “work,” nothing went back to normal. The function of our home office was really tested for the first time as I began working longer hours than ever and you made YouTube a full-time job. Desperate times call for desperate measures, and it was only temporary. At first, we enjoyed the break, being home together, perfect skateboarding weather, and time to relax.
S*&% got real – it’s official, this year sucks
And then it went on. Months later, with limited reliable information about COVID-19, fear of the unknown, the inability follow our normal routine, and no end in sight, we were thinking a little differently. I still loved being with you all the time…aaaaaaall the time.But work became heavy, YouTube lost its glitz, and all you had was us, all the time. Confinement reared its ugly head.
Don’t get me wrong – I was so thankful for our health, for the quality of our company, for our pretty little house, and for access to most of the things we needed. Toilet paper was low, and some of our creature comforts weren’t there, but we’re 3rd world kind of people – we’d make do. There are no winners in this pandemic but all things considered, we were extremely lucky and we prayed those who were less fortunate.
But then online school started. Twenty-six squirrely kids learning online, not quite able to read the instructions on your screens, your attention spans truncated by a summer of extraordinary screen-time, trapped with your boring parents who were also your teachers of divided-attention. You screamed, “I like school but now I can never leave!”
Your birthday was small, you didn’t get that summer vacation, you missed Halloween at school because of allergies (but who knows these days?), the list goes on. All the while, your justified outbursts, anger, frustration, and meltdowns served as an outlet and mirror for what I was feeling. Yep, this year sucks.
A little perspective on the pandemic
But you know what? You were a daycare baby and I a working mom. I missed so many “firsts,” so many critical moments in your development. For the first time, I was able to weather the meltdowns with you, sit with you when you needed me, breathe through the anger, and experience what you were going through as you were going through it. I feel blessed that when you most needed me, I was there. We were coping and processing…together.
Your hilarious sense of humor, kindness, innocent insights…all for me and Dada. That did not suck. As physical distancing this summer brought a digital closeness, a reassessing of priorities, and a closer connection to what matters most – great friends, family, life passions – so it brought the creatures in our house closer.
We learned together, worked on projects, made the house prettier and more comfortable, went on walks and morning swims, had innumerable movie nights, and fulfilling conversations. It was really beautiful, actually. And though we were hunkered-down in our urban above-ground bunker, isolated from most of the world and certainly from our routines of years-past – I felt blessed. For our health, our peace, and our family. Us.
Let it change you for the better
My worst fear for your generation is that this pandemic will change you, make you fear in-person connections, or self-soothe with screen time. But there are a few lessons from all this I hope will shape how you see the world going forward.
- Family is always there for you. This includes “the family you choose.” Your ride-or-die best friends, people who love you unconditionally, people who make your heart full.
- You’ve got to roll with the punches. Take moments when you need them to feel all the feels, and when you’re done, breathe, step back, and carry on.
- Nature is the most beautiful screen. You’ve taken to catching geckos, making wildflower arrangements, anddigging your toes in the mud. I hope nature always brings you peace.
- We have the power to create. In some ways, shortage creates resourcefulness and abundance. No bread in the store? Will make some! No TP? Use a sock. Just kidding.
- Pursue your passions. Learn to prioritize what’s important and valuable to you. Whether it’s skateboarding and crafting, or in my case, language and health, what’s important to you will make itself clear if you’re paying attention.
Between this pandemic, politics, social unrest and inequality, natural disasters, and all the stuff I’ve been only partly effective in shielding you from this year, we’re okay. In fact, we’re good. Healthier and stronger, united, loved – your parents will always have your back. Yep, this year sure sucks, but it won’t always be like this – hopefully all the years of your lifetime will be kinder. Glad we got that out of the way.
You are strong, smart, and resilient. We’ve learned to survive with humor, anger, conversation, and care, one day at a time. Next year will be better. But today we are good.
Loving you always,
Mama
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